Intoxication
by Tarmachan
Summary: In the midst of an evening filled with his alcohol-fueled companions pretending to be cats and swordsmen, Kurogane finds himself drinking down far more than he can handle, and confronts an evasive magician on his past. K/F, remix fic.


**Disclaimer: Tsubasa belongs to CLAMP, etc...**

**Spoilers!: Up to Outo, and for Fai's past.**

**Info:** So this was written for the remix challenge at the **kuroxfai** comm on lj- the task was to take an established fic from your assigned author, and write a fanfic of the fanfic. My choice of story was the brilliant **Toasty** by **Uakari**, which can be found on ff also- if you haven't, go read her stuff!

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><p>Night had fallen in the country of Outo. Artificial lights blinked on all over the city, banishing the darkness with an electric glow that shielded the stars from human eyes; such a glow could be seen shining from the vast windows of a certain cafe, tucked away from the bustle of the city centre and surrounded by lush vegetation. It was a recent addition to the growing metropolis, but its popularity had surged up almost overnight, customers from far and wide coming to sample the culinary delights.<p>

The cafe was currently closed, if not for the time of day then for the fact that the streets were deserted at night. Darkness was the domain of demons, and only registered hunters had the skills and means to defeat them. Inside the cafe, however, a flurry of activity remained. The four people (plus their strange talking mascot) currently occupying the establishment, which also served as their residence, were all wide awake, and the noises that could be heard from the outside suggested they were entertaining a group of rowdy felines.

"Goddamn it, mage- _why_ the hell did you give them _alcohol_? I thought the manjuu was bad enough normally, but this is ridiculous! _Stop_ encouraging the princess to copy you! And _you_—" He said, addressing a small boy with messy brown hair who was currently brandishing a ladle at a potted plant, "put that thing down before you injure yourself! In fact, do me a favour and _go kill the idiot magician with it_!"

_If you can't handle your liquor, then don't drink it in the first place!_

He took another swig from the large bottle of alcohol in his hand, applying his face to his free palm. Why the hell did he have to babysit them all, anyway? Since when was he, a killer feared all over his native land, the responsible adult? He leant back against the wall, sighing. It was really warm in here, and all the heat coming off the two cats and the manjuu bouncing on the sofa really wasn't helping. Various methods of ending the life of the annoying blonde idiot who instigated this whole mess whirled around his head, and he carefully filed each one away for future consideration.

"Ne, ne, Kuro-nyaaaaan! Come join us!" The idiot mage yelled to him from across the room, looking even more absurd than usual with the napkin he had folded into cat ears, which he was currently waving above his head.

He ignored the call, choosing to spend some more time with his good friend Mr. Gin. This was the kind of friend who would sit and listen whilst he ranted about whatever vexation the blonde had caused today, and would make him feel much better after a hard day's work. It never tried to hug him, call him stupid names or pretend to be what was _definitely the most annoying cat he had ever had the misfortune to meet_.

After another hour or so of pure torture, and after promising the kid that he would teach him how to fight (which led to many bows of thanks culminating in the boy almost cracking his head on the floor), the mage finally had the sense to try and usher the kids off to bed. The blonde led the princess from the room (_still meowing at the tops of their lungs, goddamn them_), manjuu perched on his head, trying to convince them that the bed was where cats liked it best. It seemed to be slow going, especially when the kid was still swinging his ladle at everything remotely resembling an enemy (which appeared to be _everything_ to him), but Kurogane made no move to help. The idiot could clean up his mess; it had nothing to do with him whatsoever. He drank from the bottle again, trying to drown out the noises ricocheting off the walls by going over the methods he might use with the kid tomorrow. They'd have to work on that issue with his eyes, first of all...

He suddenly noticed, with a shake of the rather large bottle, that his friend was starting to push past the 'glass half empty' stage into the '_dear god get me another so I can forget what cats _are' stage. Quickly spying another bottle of the good stuff resting on the counter, and with the room free of faux-cat tripping hazards, he hauled himself up from his spot on the floor and made his way over with as much ninja skill as he could muster. The last thing he wanted now was for them to spot him in motion and decide to come back to join him. He just hoped the mage was heading to bed as well; he was not in the mood for any further annoyances tonight.

As he crossed the midway point to the counter, he was hit with a strange sensation. Was it just him, or did the room suddenly gain some motion? He glanced into the hallway that he could see from his position, searching for their presence. Were the mage and his apprentice in the way of the cat jumping up and down so much that the floor was shaking? But no, that couldn't be right- he couldn't feel anything jumping underneath him.

_So then what the hell is going on?_

It was like a cloud had settled in his brain, murky and heavy and _what was he doing again_? Oh right, the bottle. He started forwards towards it again, almost tripping over his own feet but recovering quick enough to avoid a confrontation with the ground. Huh. There was definitely something wrong with him.

"How very un-ninja-like of you, Kuro-stumble!" A voice proclaimed from his right, sounding as bright, cheery and annoying as ever.

_Goddamn it, I thought the idiot had gone to bed._

The blond vexation in question was leaning in the doorway to the hall, smirk slowly spreading up towards his cheeks as he took in the sight of the unsteady ninja. That stupid smile usually annoyed him, a mask to hide the face beneath, but in his current state it was near-infuriating.

"What the hell are you smiling for, mage?" He demanded, though he couldn't help but notice that the words came out a little more slurred than intended.

"Just admiring the bottle in your hands, Kuro-wobble! It must be a great liquor indeed to get the almighty ninja drunk!"

"I am not drunk!"

"Oh but you are," he replied, sauntering closer, evidently not as drunk as he had appeared to be minutes earlier. "You're pissed up! Plastered! Three sheets to the wind!"

"Shut the hell up, idiot!" Kurogane snarled in reply, tongue starting to feel fat and heavy in his mouth. This was bad. Maybe it was the alcohol? Not that he'd ever admit that out loud to the mage. He took another step towards the counter, which suddenly seemed _really_ far away, especially when he legs were having some sort of disagreement about which way they should go.

"You must have really not liked her," the mage continued, a teasing lilt to his voice. He was slowly positioning himself between Kurogane and his next drink; a dangerous position to be in. _He'll soon find out _how _dangerous if he doesn't get out of my way_... His brain was growing fuzzier by the minute, so he quickly asked the magician what he meant by his question with a simple growling "Aa?"

"The _woman_, Kuro-sloshed, the one you know from your home! Your face when you saw her was priceless (even if you did drop me on poor Syaoran-kun), so I was wondering who she was to make you panic so much! And then you went and drowned yourself in gin, so I concluded, Kuro-smashed, that you _really_ wanted to forget that you ever saw her!"

By the time his tiresome ramblings had finished, there was a mere two metres between Kurogane and his salvation from the blonde (_because passing out is so much more preferable to this_). He wasn't in the mood for anything more from the smaller man, and his brain, all filters removed by the alcohol, came straight out with what had just flashed through his consciousness because it knew it would lead to a quick escape from the other man.

"I bet you won't have that stupid cheerful face stuck on when we run into one of your world's lookalikes."

The change in the atmosphere was tangible.

Any warmth that had been in the room quickly drained through the cracks in the walls, leaving a deathly cold that Kurogane thought he could almost feel against his skin. The mage's face was a picture of frozen shock, a barren field of ice betraying pain and fear. It only lasted for a few seconds, but Kurogane memorised every twitch of muscles that revealed the magician's true face.

In an emulation of theatre, the mask suddenly snapped back into place, frown shifting to plastic smile as its owner tried to regain composure. There was no hiding that frosty look in his eyes, however, and it was these that Kurogane focused on as he moved closer, their bodies inches apart now as he leaned over the smaller man, bottle dropping to the floor with a loud clunk, arms leaning against wood on either side and trapping the magician between himself and the counter. Forget escaping, that expression had woken other urges in him, ones that demanded he know what was so damn horrible that the mage had to walk around with a big fat fake smile plastered on. Normally, he'd have restrained this impulse, saying that he didn't care about the other man's past, but that little niggling part of his brain that actually _maybe_ wondered what was wrong had decided to come out uninhibited.

"Why the hell do you do that?" He demanded, hands there for balance as much as to pin down the evasive magician. "Why smile when I know damn well you're not happy?"

He was struggling, Kurogane could see, to keep up the cheery persona. There was panic amongst the cerulean, like a trapped wild animal. His eyes were currently focused anywhere but his.

"Come now, Kuro-tan," the mage began, his heart not really into the name-calling, "We should get you to bed before you decide to make friends with the floor."

_Don't change the subject._

"Shut up mage, I'm fine," he replied, hands still maintaining a sturdy grip on the counter that remained unmoving as the mage pressed back further into it, trying to distance himself from the ninja. His body was turned slightly away, tensed as if ready to escape at any given opportunity. Kurogane leaned a little closer, pushing his face into the smaller man's personal space, his whole presence demanding an answer.

"I can smell the alcohol on your breath, Kuro-gin! You really should—"

"Shut. Up." He growled back, silencing the blonde immediately.

"Are you going to threaten me every time I do something you don't like?" The mage suddenly asked, fringe covering the eyes drilling holes in the floor. His voice was cold, despite the warmth that he was trying to inject into it.

The sudden confrontation surprised Kurogane. Usually he'd be trying to escape as quickly as possible from this, but instead he was pushing back a little; this was the closest to annoyed that he had ever seen the man. He could smell a fair amount of alcohol on the mage's breath, too, wondering if that was the reason for his sudden gain of backbone.

"I just need to know that whatever baggage you're carrying isn't going to screw up this journey." Kurogane replied, being truthful for the most part, though simple curiosity was a driving factor of this interrogation also. "I need to get back to my country, and I can't do that if something you're hiding comes to bite us in the ass later on. If it does, magician, I swear I will end you."

"Threats, Kuro-sama? How unlike you!" The smaller man replied, amusement in his voice, though it was more bitter than normal.

"Answer the question for once in your life, _magician_." Kurogane demanded.

"Alright."

A low voice began to emanate from underneath the blonde curtain in front of him, a cold sound that Kurogane had never before heard from the man, ill fitting with his usual bubbly persona. _Is this the real Fai_, he wondered, listening attentively, _is this the man behind all false pretences?_

"I'm actually a double agent." The blonde began, head tilting up so that one of his eyes could pierce through the veil, icy gaze boring into his own. "I was sent on this journey to make sure the princess falls into the hands of my employer, and I'm supposed to kill you if you get in my way. Oh, and Fai isn't even my real name."

_Wait, what?_

A sharp laugh cut through the air, breaking the silence. The magician was laughing at him; that _stupid fake face_ was laughing at him. "K-Kuro-sama! Your face! You didn't really believe that, did you?" More giggles erupted from his mouth, and he lifted his hands up to rest on Kurogane's chest, patting him lightly. "To say that you can see through me so well, that was terrible form, Kuro-gullible! Maybe it's the alcohol?"

"Shut up, idiot," He repeated. His vocabulary was becoming more limited by the second, and he found it easier to fall back on familiar phrases rather than kick his brain into stringing together new sentences. Thankfully, this was exactly what he'd wanted to say. "If you're not going to say anything useful, then get the hell out of the way to the booze."

He reached past the blonde to the fresh bottle, unscrewing the cap and proceeding to gulp down another good helping of gin. If the magician was going to be evasive as usual, even when his tongue had been loosened a little, then he was going to ignore the idiot and continue as planned. Maybe he could actually manage to get properly drunk for the first time in years; it would certainly ease the annoyingly awkward atmosphere beginning to creep up between them, especially when they had to share a room in this country. It seemed to be working so far, since the room was definitely spinning more than a moment ago. He offered the bottle to the smaller man, figuring it was only polite since he was currently pinning him to the counter. The blonde took a small mouthful, savouring the taste of the liquor before swallowing. Kurogane held out his hand for the bottle, body swaying a little with only one hand propping him against the wooden surface, but the blonde only shook his head as he replaced the cap.

"Now, now, Kuro-borderline, I think you've had more than enough." The mage chuckled, reaching into the air behind himself, holding the bottle as far back and as out of reach as possible.

"Oi, give it here, idiot mage!"

"I think you're going to have to work on some new insults there, Kuro-vocab," the smaller man replied, refusing to return the alcohol. He stretched back even further, laughing, taking the alcohol with him.

The ninja refused to give up, however, and followed the other man's lead, leaning over him, one arm stretching towards oblivious freedom. He didn't particularly care right now that he was probably crushing the mage's back into the pointy corner of the bar, and pushed forwards regardless, until his fingers could scrape at the glass bottom of the bottle, scrabbling for further purchase.

It wasn't until the mage gasped that he realised what position they were in.

In his drink-derived desperation to reach more alcohol, he'd forced the blonde to bend backwards over the counter, his feet almost off the floor as his back arched in what couldn't have been a comfortable position. Although it would've been quite difficult to have moved into that position by himself, the magician had been aided by Kurogane's body, pressed flush against his and forcing him slowly up onto the wooden surface. Anyone walking in right now would have taken one look at the pair and thought the worst, especially since Kurogane's thigh had just inadvertently pushed up against the magician's groin. That would have been the source of the gasp.

Suddenly he didn't think he wanted the alcohol anymore. In fact, he might just like to go outside and let the demons eat him. Yeah, that would be preferable to this.

"Kuro-s-sama..." A voice said from just below his face, and he fell back to reality with a startling swoop. They were frozen in the stance, faces inches apart as each took in the result of the mage's little game. The smaller man's face was a little flushed, and there was something in his eyes that Kurogane couldn't quite (and possibly didn't want to) fathom. He felt more out of it than ever; his face felt hot, his heart was pumping wildly and his thoughts were becoming increasingly sluggish. He hadn't felt this way since he had first started drinking as a teenager. Maybe he had underestimated the power of this world's alcohol.

Against his every wish, his eyes were still examining the other man's face with fascination, taking in the blonde strands splayed across the milky skin, the line of his jaw, the curve of those small pink lips, open and letting air escape in rapid bursts. He felt the azure gaze fix onto his own face, the breath of the magician tickling at the tip of his nose, as slim fingers moved to cup his cheek, tracing lines of fire across his skin. He opened his mouth to say something, brain struggling to formulate another coherent sentence, his breath mingling with the mage's. They were so close now, lips mere moments from connecting, Kurogane's face moving closer and further away in his un-coordination. Another breathy gasp escaped from the man underneath him, sweet air invading his open mouth, and through the fog came the startling realisation that his thigh hadn't moved since he had first noticed its compromising position.

Using every last reserve of coherency, he forced his body into action, retracting the offending limb and stepping back just enough to allow the magician to slide back down onto the flats of his feet. Their groins slid against each other briefly, causing an unexpected shiver to run up Kurogane's spine, accompanied by a brief rush of heat to the offending area. The magician let out a badly suppressed moan at the friction, thankfully unnoticed by the intoxicated ninja, and tried to think of what he was going to prepare for breakfast tomorrow (well, it was today, now) to distract himself from his growing arousal.

As the smaller man reached his original position, still pressed fairly close to the wobbling ninja, Kurogane once again opened his mouth to say something. "Mage," he addressed the smaller man, leaning his face closer to the smaller man once again. The magician unconsciously wet his lips as the larger man's face grew closer and closer, mouth still parted as if to continue.

They were so close again, mouths teasing with heated breaths as if daring the other to make the first move. Their bodies were touching in a line of heat from hip to ankle, and Fai cursed himself briefly for being unable to hide his now obvious arousal. Kurogane's hands still trapped the blonde against the counter, shaking as if struggling to hold his weight. One of the blonde's hands still held the bottle away from the ninja, waiting for the surprise attack that might come, but the other had moved on its own accord, sliding onto the larger man's chest and digging his fingers into the fabric of Kurogane's shirt. He felt himself leaning his face towards the other man, lips searching for their partners, and wondered briefly what the hell he thought he was doing. This wasn't a part of his mission; he was supposed to _kill_ this man if he became a hindrance, not sleep with him as his body seemed to want to do. It was too late to turn back now, though, as those lips descended lower; the moment they touched him he knew he wouldn't be able to stop what came afterwards. He closed his eyes, resigning himself to whatever _afterwards_ meant. He could figure out what to do later, when he was more sober and self-critical. Now, he just waited for the press of lips against his...

... and instead almost fainted as a heavy weight collapsed on him, slamming his back into the corner of the counter once again and forcing the air from his lungs.

Opening his eyes, gasping for breath, he realised that the larger man had finally passed out. His dead weight was currently crushing him, so he shifted the huge mass of ninja a little, earning some breathing space. Kurogane's head rested comfortably on his shoulder, breathing steady, face a little strange without the ever-present frown; he looked younger, somehow, and it made Fai realise his own great age with an overwhelming sense of fatigue. How long had it been since he had seen his brother smile? How long ago was it that he had promised to make this journey? How long since he became the pawn of the man with the bat crest?

"If only you knew, Kuro-sama..." he said to the unconscious ninja, mask slipping off since there was no one around to see the sad smile that painted his face.

The dawn chorus was in full swing when the ninja emerged from his shared room for breakfast. The magician had been gone from the bed opposite when he woke, though the delicious odour wafting from the kitchen quickly explained his location. He washed and dressed quickly, pulling himself out of the lethargy trying to entice him back to slumber. He was supposed to be training the kid today, he distinctly recalled, though the rest of last night became a little unclear after that. There was no trace of a hangover, but he suspected that the alcohol he had drunk that evening probably had something to do with the lack of memories. And with the slight burning in the backs of his legs, he decided, briefly examining them to find light scrapes adorning his flesh.

Passing through the hallway into the main room, he spied the mage at work behind the counter, flipping something over in the frying pan. As he took his place on one of the barstools in front of the wooden bar, the blonde turned to greet him, that stupid fake smile firmly in place. There was something wavering behind it, however, like fear or a related emotion, but Kurogane couldn't quite place it.

"Good morning, Kuro-sober! How are you feeling?"

"Perfectly fine, mage," He replied. "Though I don't remember much of last night apart from the part where you were being a bad influence on the princess and the kid."

"I see!" The magician replied, strange nuance behind the smile disappearing. He flipped whatever was in the frying pan high into the air, catching it once again without a single blunder. His back faced the ninja, creating a wall of silence between them again. It was only when he brought bitter tasting coffee over to the larger man, along with a savoury pancake ("because I know Kuro-tan hates sweet stuff!") that Kurogane decided to ask.

"So what happened last night?"

The magician chuckled to himself as he walked around the counter to Kurogane's side, straightening up the tables in preparation for the cafe's opening later in the morning.

"Well, it was quite the experience seeing you struggling to walk! I never thought I'd be able to see Kuro-rin like _that_..."

"Like _what_? And why the hell do I have scrapes on the backs of my legs?" He asked, though he instantly regretted having done so. That evil grin was there. The one that he saw on the witch all too often when she had some sort of Kurogane-humiliating plot in store. This could not be good, especially not when he had no way of knowing if what the magician was about to say was true or not.

"Do you _reeeeaaaally_ want to know?" The blonde asked, turning towards Kurogane, lecherous smirk now plastered from ear to ear. He sashayed over from the table he was arranging, putting one foot in front of the other in the most lascivious way possible. Kurogane had swung around on the bar stool to face the smaller man, but had no time to move off before the lithe body was in front of him, arms on either side of the counter caging him in his seat. The mage was the same size as him now that he was sitting down, and he could only lean back so far as the other man leaned his face in too close, blue eyes sparkling with amusement.

"It was a pretty fun night," he said, voice low and quiet because of their proximity, and the ninja could have sworn that he was almost purring. "It's a shame you can't remember how you got those _carpet burns_..."

_W-WHAT? O-Oh what did I do last night? There's no way in hell I did what I know he's suggesting, stupid lecherous mage! Ah, there's no need to imagine it! That'll just make it worse! G-Goddamn it!_

Despite his best efforts, a blush matching the colour of his eyes crept into Kurogane's cheeks at the implication, accompanied by strange spluttering sounds that formed the remnants of a sentence that Kurogane could no longer remember.

A grin worthy of the Cheshire Cat himself splayed proudly across the mage's face at the larger man's reaction.

"Yes, it's such a shame you can't remember the effort I put into carrying you back to your room when you passed out. You were that heavy, I even had to drag you halfway! I'm not sure why you were blushing at the thought of that, Kuro-crimson, unless you were embarrassed that you can't hold your liquor... or maybe you were thinking of something _dirty_?"

He leapt back from the inevitable fist that swung at his head.

"Shut up, idiot mage!" The ninja growled, sliding off the stool towards the blonde, a menacing look in his eyes.

"Now, now, Kuro-smut, you don't even have your sword. How can you properly chase me?"

"I DON'T NEED MY SWORD TO KILL YOU!"

With an excited "hyuu!" the magician danced away from his oncoming doom, leaping over one of the large tables using a single hand as leverage and positioning it between him and the raging ninja. He dashed around another, waiting for the other man to catch up before putting some distance between them again. Kurogane chased, as usual, yelling and swearing as he took up the ladle the kid had used the previous night. Their usual dance continued for a good three minutes, until a small whimper from the hallway entrance drew their attention and they ground to a halt.

In the doorway was Syaoran, slumped halfway down the frame with both hands clutching at his skull, face the colour of ash.

"Could you please stop yelling?" He pleaded, raw suffering rippling across his features, "I think I had a little too much last night."

Fai immediately took over the situation, motherly persona switching on as he crossed over to the boy and scooped him up from the floor, leading him to a barstool. "Don't you worry, Syaoran-kun," the blonde said brightly (though in a very quiet voice) "I'll whip you up something to take the edge off of that hangover you're sporting! Then you can go learn how to hit things with a stick from Kuro-sama,"

"It's NOT JUST—" He noticed the fresh pain crossing the kid's face, paused, and quickly dropped his voice down a few notches. "It is not just hitting things with a stick, idiot magician. There's technique and hard work that come with fighting with a sword. We have to work on a few things before we get to that, anyway."

"Sure, Kuro-expert," the blonde replied, tone clearly indicating a lack of interest in the subject. He got the feeling that the smaller man was doing that on purpose, just to tease him some more, so he ignored the jibe and stalked over to the door. It felt extremely strange to be going outside without a sword by his side, but there was no helping it, seeing as how he had broken the one he had been using the night before. He'd have to go buy one soon, or he's get antsy. Maybe he could take the kid to get his at the same time, since he'd eventually need one. There was no doubt that the kid would make an excellent swordsman, if he could overcome his current shortcomings; he already had the physical strength to wield a blade after all, and something to protect with it.

Wobbling slightly as he stood, Syaoran thanked Fai for his pick-me-up breakfast and followed his teacher out of the door, wincing as the sounds of the city grew louder.

Fai set about washing their plates and cutlery, running all of the tasks that needed completing today through his head. Sakura wouldn't be up for a little while yet, so he had some time alone to think. He hated that, since it inevitably brought him face to face with everything he was running from. Instead, he tried to focus on more recent events.

He thought back to the night before, how close he had come to pressing his lips against the ninjas and accepting the consequences to follow. How good it had felt when their bodies had been pushed up against each other, the rolling heat as their groins had inadvertently come into contact. The ninja's face when he had implied that the carpet burns were a lot less innocent than in reality... what _had_ he been thinking exactly? Images rushed into his mind of a dozen different scenarios, each one enough to stir his lower regions enticingly. He quickly pushed those thoughts away, too tired to deal with the implications and the worrying emotions that came along with them. He was supposed to be detached from all of this, a secret pawn walking through this group of travellers in shadow and mystery. He couldn't afford to let his feelings take over here, not when there was so much at stake.

_Maybe it's best not to think at all._

He picked up a tea towel and proceeded to dry a glass, focusing on the task at hand to erase any stray notions from his mind. Still, he couldn't help his eyes wandering towards the front door, after the brash ninja and his student. He recalled their visit to Clover the previous evening, the tinkle of piano keys, the dulcet tones of the beautiful bar owner, the things he had inadvertently let slip as the ninja questioned him. The man was so persistent, he decided, and yet he couldn't bring himself to hate him.

"Ever the curious one, Kuro-sama," He sighed a little, mask slipping now that no one was around. "If things were different, I might have liked it to be you that took me away..."

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading- reviews are love! :D<strong>


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